Touring Aint' Easy, But Someone's Gotta Do It

A lot of people think that comedians just hop on a jet do a tight forty-five, drop the mic and ride off into the sunset with a groupie and a sack full of cash, ... that ain't comedy touring. That's more like a fever dream. 

Real touring, real touring, returning a rental car that smells like a year's worth of Taco Bell. Waking up in a Super8. Living off a gas station beef jerky. Doing shows in bars where the stage is made out of plywood and milk crates. And playing to crowds who thought they were there for karaoke night. 

Sometimes it's more like a psychological experiment than a comedy show. 

 Nothing glamorous about driving six hours to a gig where you got beer soaked floors and fly tape in the corner.  Touring ain't easy, but somebody's got to do it. You got to keep the people laughing. Sometimes you catch lightning in a bottle. You got a packed room. You got a hot crowd. You actually have a microphone that works good. You got a bartender who knows when to cut people off. They got a little bit of crowd control. 

And that's what makes all the road grime and questionable motels worth it. 

It ain't easy, but it's an adventure. 

You want to travel across this country, you're going to see some weirdos. You're also going to see some legends. And you might actually build some actual fans. 

All right, so here's to all the comics on the road, the warriors of the weeknight, the kings and queens of the... Budget friendly buffet.

 If you can survive comedy on the road, you can survive anything.